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Virtual toxicity in the workplace. Pixabay photo provided by Incrementis. EFE.
E-mails or off-tone messages, calls to manipulate the recipient, colleagues who complain about their tasks or aggressive video calls that generate submission in those who receive them fearing the reactions that could be provoked if they express their own opinions, are examples of ‘virtual toxicity’.
With the arrival of the coronavirus and the implementation of remote work, inappropriate behaviors ‘face to face’ In the face-to-face office, they have been transferred to the virtual sphere, through the screens, where the manipulative and/or aggressive aspects of some people can be enhanced, according to the firm Incrementis.
  If a person is assertive, it means that he has the ability to express himself and say what he thinks or feels, respecting his interlocutor and respecting himself. By itself, it reduces the probability of offenses and toxic behaviors in the labor relationship, according to David Comí, director of Incrementis.
Today we know that the highest rate of medical leave is caused by anxiety and depression, and that the main reason why we end up suffering from these disorders more frequently is to maintain relationships with people in our closest environment. ;We are nearby that are toxic to us, explains the psychologist Silvia Congost, an expert in self-esteem and emotional dependency.
Having a relationship with someone who is toxic, whether in the workplace, friendship, family or relationship, can imply that, “if you don’t get away from that person or don’t learn to treat and take care of yourself, they will end up being toxic. unbalancing your life and destroying you completely, psychologically, physically and emotionally”, says Congost (www.silviacongost.com), author of the book “Toxic People”.
Relationships with those people who are destructive and harmful to us, who alter and disturb our inner peace and mental calm, who intoxicate, invalidate, diminish and destroy us, are a hard and destructive experience that only fills us with suffering, sadness and frustration, according to this psychologist.
She points out that “the bonds we create with the people around us are extremely important to us. We value them and they affect us. They can do us a lot of good if they are healthy, or destroy us if they are not”.
“That, for example, at work they want to see you fail is an option that probably does not fit with your way of seeing life and understanding ties,” Congost points out.
In the professional environment and workplace, where the way of communicating and interacting is fundamental, the presence
The presence of toxic people makes professional relationships difficult and causes unnecessary wear and tear on oneself, explains David Comí, trainer and director of the consulting firm Incrementis, (www.incrementis.es) specializing in job optimization.
Points out that with the growing implementation of teleworking, toxic people, who previously exerted their influence in the office environment, are now capable of transferring their behaviors that generate discomfort and conflict to through digital screens, generating what I ate. described as “virtual toxicity” at work.
“This type of behavior can be especially hard to bear in the world of work, including telecommuting”, he emphasizes.
To maintain constructive relationships, prevent conflicts, deal with disrespect and attacks, and possible attempts at manipulation in the workplace, recommends applying assertiveness in our relationship with toxic people.
Assertiveness consists of being able to “express oneself and say what one thinks and values, without offending, respecting the other person and oneself” explains.
David describes to EFE three examples of virtual toxicity that have become frequent in teleworking relationships, and how to act assertively in such situations:
The negative and complaining person< /h2>
These types of toxic people “only see problems around them. In your world there are no proposals or solutions. Everything seems “impossible”. They use phrases like: “I think it will work out. bad…”, “I already warned you”. In addition, they exaggerate reality, when necessary.
-How to act: It is advisable to initially listen to their objections so that they “vent” and then try to get them to show us their negativity with data and objective evidence. Sometimes it is necessary to change the conversation, since it is not worth entering into a non-constructive dialogue with someone who is toxic, according to Comí.
The manipulative person
This type of individual, highly dangerous, uses half-truths for his own benefit, considers people as a means to achieve his personal goals, deliberately creates misunderstandings and has no respect for the truth.
The manipulative individual acts with a very subtle and ambiguous attitude, underestimates people, resorts to traps and tricks, and shows a high pride and self-esteem.
-How to act: To interact with this type of toxic people and avoid being manipulated, I He recommends preparing in advance with demonstrable facts, responding to each of their deceptions, always speaking with simple and clear messages and not explaining private situations from the past.
“Manipulators must be taught firmness and assertiveness from the beginning” emphasizes.
The dictatorial and aggressive person
These individuals like to intimidate and appear arrogant. They need to dominate everything that surrounds them, they are intolerant of the attitudes of others and cannot stand those who think differently, because they consider that their truth (that of the dictator) is “the” true.
They are aggressive people, who use this behavior as a mechanism of self-defense and hostility, as a form of imposition and use of force. Their toxic behavior generates high energy expenditure, offers ephemeral results, if any, and usually reflects personal frustrations and insecurities.
-How to act: If we show submission , the aggressive dictator will believe We know that we are weak and it will increase. their toxic behavior. You have to treat him with the utmost respect, but very firmly, using a direct, clear and concise tone of voice, according to Comí.